Author Fighters: The Antics of a Lunatic
by The Angelic Soldier
Summary: This story is about Lunatic121 hitting the world by force! This is like a bunch of one-shots, so don't expect the stories to tie together!


_Hello, and welcome to a story of many stories...it's the Antics of Lunatic121! Both of us are going to work together to give you a laugh today!_

_Enjoy!_

In New York City, a band of heroes, known as the Author Fighters, lived. Strong to the core, all of them are sane and ready for action…except for one…

Lunatic121 leaped onto a couch in the Author Fighters base. He stretched his arms out a bit and then searched for the remote for the TV in front of him. Lunatic looked left and right trying to find this device, but only to come out with a quarter, two M&Ms, and a chewed pencil. Lunatic sighed and got off his couch.

"Great…one day off and I still can't be lazy," he murmured. He sulked to the front of the television and hit the power button. The screen flickered and turned on as Lunatic plopped back down on the sofa. He jumped from the sofa and rubbed his rear. He then turned to the couch with anger as he saw that he left the tack facing upward. Lunatic smacked his head and picked up the tack. He chucked it out an open window in the base.

Suddenly, screaming is heard and two cars collide. Lunatic saw this and cringed as the people got out of the cars to yell. Lunatic quickly flew to the sofa and hid as the show on the TV continued.

Angelic Soldier happened to pass by and see that Lunatic was watching something, so he joined in. He folded up his wings and sat in an armchair near the sofa that Lunatic was on. Angelic felt that he had sat on something. He reached into the cushion and pulled out the remote for the TV. Lunatic looked at him with amazement and disbelief. The angel shrugged and turned up the volume.

-=-

(A/N: This is coming from the TV…obviously)

"Jerry! Jerry! Jerry!"

An audience was looking towards a man that was wearing glasses, a suit, and a weird hairstyle that was carrying a microphone and a card that said "The Jerry Springer Show" in over-done, block letters. The card was also pink.

The host (Jerry Springer) looked towards the audience that was staring at him and announced, "Thank you…thank you very much! For those of you just joining us, we are talking about new evils of the world today!"

A boo was heard from the audience.

Jerry then pointed to the stage, which had three different people in cushioned chairs and another chair was next to them that was empty. In the first chair, a man sat that looked like a Nazi officer. The second had a turban and a giant beard. The third was wearing all white and had a symbol on his white robe that said 'KKK.'

Jerry walked up onto the gray-carpeted stage and looked towards the people and the cameras once again. "OK, let's bring out our next person, Mr. Gort Evil!"

A man walked into the entrance doorway of the stage. He was about six feet tall and was built like an average person. He wore black shoes, black pants, and a black suit-top. His face looked rather young, despite a scar running down between his eyes. He had one green eye and one blue eye. Dr. Gort Evil also was bald.

The audience booed him as he walked to the empty seat. Gort looked to the audience and mouthed, "What? What's wrong?" The doctor parked himself in the seat that was made for him. He waved to the other evil men that sat near him. The Nazi nodded his head. The man in the turban only stared. The KKK member waved back.

Jerry settled the audience down and went up to Gort. He asked, "So, Mr. Gort Evil-"

Gort interrupted in a voice that was average, but a tad on the deep side, "Dr. Gort Evil. I didn't take five years of Evil Medical School to be called 'Mr.'"

Jerry nodded and said, "OK, then. Dr. Gort Evil, are you the brother of a different Dr. Evil we had on the show."

The doctor sighed and admitted, "Yes, I am. In fact, all I really am is a villain made up by a teenager that lives at home that needed a villain similar to my brother."

The audience was confused at first, but Jerry talked and their attention returned to the new evil man.

"I see. So, do you have a family? Do you have any friends at all?

Dr. Gort Evil shook his head and said "No."

"We've seen these other men open up to us and share their feelings."

"I'm and evil genius, okay? I don't share you flipping idiot."

The crowd started to chant "ooo…" until Jerry settled them down.

Jerry stared at Gort and said, "We have over four million people in over 20 different countries waiting for you to open up to us all. Tell us something you haven't told anyone else before."

"Oh, you want secrets?"

"Yes."

"Okay…I'm not prepared," he chuckled slightly, "I only came on here as a platform to voice my aspirations of world domination."

The crowd booed again. Gort looked offended and shouted, "Come on! Really!" Jerry settled down their rage once again.

Dr. Evil straightened up and started, "Okay, umm…I tend to ramble on. I killed my family and placed their heads in a skill crane machine at a Wal-Mart…"

The audience released a chorus of "eeww…" and vomit for some people.

Gort turned to the people next to him and saw the Nazi looking at him.

"You want more? More for the Nazi? You think so? Okay, the Nazi wants more. Umm…my bladder was removed after a broken thermometer stabbed me and sent me flying off a bus. I love toe fungus…I named my right nipple 'Adam' and the left 'West.'"

The audience continued to be disgusted. Jerry took off his glasses and stared at Dr. Evil with disbelief.

The doctor continued, "I once slept inside a horse, it was quite roomy…or maybe it was a cow…I wrote the book_ It's Raining_, or at least that's what the Christmas babies told me…I once made a marzipan voodoo effigy of Jimmy Carter while I was in a coma drinking some of the strongest alcohol known to man at Mike Myers house one a Tuesday…I'm the princess of Canada!"

Everyone was leaning in close and staring at the crazy doctor.

"Although I don't have any paper work to back that up…"

Jerry put his glasses back on. He muttered, "That was a bit too much…"

Dr. Evil sprang up from his seat and yelled, "You don't believe me you BEEP?"

The censor man knew that the time had come.

The KKK member got up and shouted, "Calm the BEEP down before I beat you BEEP for you, you BEEP!"

The set of Jerry Springer suddenly turned into a brawl. Cameramen were attacking other audience members. The audience was attacking everyone that was close to them. The turban guy and the Nazi were fighting and punching. The KKK member was biting Dr. Evil's leg.

Dr. Evil was screaming, "He's biting me! The BEEP is biting me!"

Jerry was trying to calm everything down, but he started to get thrown into the whirlpool of fighting. All you could hear was anger, punches, and bleeps.

The last thing the TV showed before it was turned off was Dr. Evil coming up in front of an unmanned camera holding a globe and yelling, "The world is mine! The world is mine you BEEP!" The globe was then thrown to the ground.

-=-

Angelic Soldier shut off the TV. He turned to Lunatic, who was looking back. They couldn't believe their eyes.

Angelic Soldier uttered, "Why would a villain show himself in front of the world?"

Lunatic screamed, "Who cares about that? What about the language? I think that the entire fight was the same noise!"

Angelic turned his head to one side, confused, but then shook it and nodded in agreement.

"You are right…that's bad too, I guess."

Lunatic stood up and spoke to the Angel, "Next time, I'LL be on the show!"

Angel stood up and smacked Lunatic. Lunatic got up from the floor and weakly stated, "Or we can go for the villain?"

Angel nodded and said, "Let's go."

They walked towards the door. Lunatic turned to Angel and asked, "Quick question…"

Angel stopped and replied, "Yes? What is it?"

"Was the smack really necessary?"

Angel pondered this for a moment and answered, "Yes. Since this chapter doesn't have any fighting for us-"

"You mean prologue?" Lunatic reminded Angel.

"Right…Since this section of the story doesn't have any action for us, I had to add some."

"Okay…that makes some sense…I think…" Lunatic mumbled.

"And that's all the sense I need! Let's go!" Angelic patted Lunatic on the back. They walked out the door and into the bustling streets of the Big Apple.

_OK, that's it! Please review, but be warned! **IF YOU FLAME, YOU SHALL PAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!**_

_Lunatic: You and I need to talk about the next chapie!_


End file.
